


Personality

by RitWrites



Category: Left 4 Dead, Left 4 Dead 2
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Jealousy, Love, Love Triangles, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-19
Updated: 2014-04-24
Packaged: 2018-01-18 19:46:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1440553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RitWrites/pseuds/RitWrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick couldn't understand how someone with so much personality and depth could be so infatuated with someone who had neither.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

They were in deep shit this time.

Okay, that was an understatement. They had been in deep shit before. _This_ was a bit worse than deep shit.

Nick felt terrible, despite the fact that he had quite a bit of extra adrenaline in his system. Ellis had given him his remaining shots, despite just having been pounced on by a hunter. Nick would have refused the kid's offer, except a hoard of infected had decided to charge at them at that specific moment. Nick had wondered if the infected had been getting smarter. It wasn't as if anything had happened to rile them. Then he saw the tank, accompanied by two chargers. The four had managed to take down the tank and one of the chargers. However, they didn't manage to do so without taking quite a few major hits. Then, when it seemed almost over, _three_ , fucking _three_ , hoards began running at them from different sides, with the last charger still running around to boot.

Nick was tired. He had gotten pummeled by the charger they had taken out, having to have been rescued by Rochelle. He could feel the blood coming from a cut in his forehead and gash in his right side. He couldn't see the charger anymore, but he could hear it. Blindly, he fired at the direction the sound was coming from, punching away the infected that clawed at him. His vision was getting fuzzy, and he was so lightheaded. He would've given anything to just close his eyes.

He knew he couldn't, though. He needed to push onward, needed to live. There was too much riding on his survival, too many things he needed to do when he pulled himself and the others from the massive depths of the hellhole they currently existed in. A pair of focused, blue eyes met his, and Nick nodded, understanding as the owner of those focused eyes reached for the pipe bomb in his pocket. Nick did the same, and the two men tossed their makeshift bombs in separate places, hoping that they would thin out the hoard a bit. Ellis might have treated the apocalypse as a game when they had first met, but hell if the guy hadn't grown up a considerable amount since then.

Ellis gave Nick a quick grin, as the bombs went off in unison, his eyes sparkling, but not without a hint of bitterness behind them. Bitterness that Nick was sure only he was able to see. That was the first reason why Nick had to get out of that mess. He had to get Ellis out before he became too scarred to be himself anymore. Before the man Nick had found himself falling for over the months of torture and hardship was gone forever.

Nick hated himself for falling in love with anyone. But, falling in love with Ellis made it so much worse.

The fall had been gradual, he could have stopped it. Or, that was what Nick told himself. He really had hated Ellis at first. Nick hated anything stupid, unless that stupid thing was letting him take advantage of it in some way. Ellis never let Nick get the upper hand on any situation, though. The hick could shoot just as well as Nick, and could run faster to boot. He had held strong, Nick had rarely ever seen the kid even flinch. Ellis really could laugh in the face of danger.

It wasn't until after the second helicopter pilot had a heart attack, sending them plummeting back to Earth - back to _H_ _ell_ \- that Ellis' laughter became bitter.

That had been the night when all of the little things: the way Ellis always took care of Nick before himself, the positivity - the glue - that had held them together for so long, the way Ellis focused during a hoard attack, so as to protect everyone else, the confident way the kid held himself, even during an insult blast from Nick, the soft, always eager blue eyes, even the stupid fucking accent, had just outright grabbed a hold of Nick. And it hadn't let go yet. Because, that night, Ellis did nothing but stare blankly into the flames of the fire Coach had started. There were no positive words, no story to cheer them up, just that stare.

It was then that Nick had understood. Ellis had never thought of the mess they were in as a game. Not ever. If he had, he'd have been his usual positive self, or he'd be hysterical. Crying, laughing, or destroying things at least. But, he just stared. It was with that realization - that most of Ellis' stupid, happy-go-lucky attitude was for their benefit and theirs alone - that he had fallen. That kid had guts that Nick could only dream of having.

Even with the bombs, the hoard was still much too thick for them to take on in their state. Nick felt like the ground was spinning him every which way. An infected man had shoved him to his knees. He couldn't see Rochelle or Coach. He could barely even see Ellis. He tried shouting to him, but the hick was already chin deep in zombie scum and could scarcely move, himself.

"HOLD ON, NICK!" Nick heard the southerner shout, as he smashed a few zombies in the stomach with his shotgun. There wasn't much he could do, his body wouldn't allow him to stand up, no matter how many times he tried.

"RO!" Nick heard another voice. He could have sworn it was Coach's. Then, he saw Ellis go down.

"EL!" Nick screamed, shoving the infected that were clawing at him, as he stumbled and crawled in Ellis' direction, hastily.

_Please be okay, kid. I can't lose you! Not here!_

Then the charger found him.

Nick let out a yelp as the charger scooped him up, and threw him to the ground. Nick heard a sickening crunch that he guessed to be one of his ribs. He was too tired to feel much pain any longer.

_My God…this is the end, isn't it?_

A shot rang through the air.

_Ellis…_

Several more shots followed in a frenzy after it.

_I'm so, so fucking sorry…_

Nick could hear distant voices. They seemed kind of familiar.

Suddenly, something heavy was on top of him. It was the charger. Someone had killed it.

"Francis, over here!" a female voice called out. Suddenly, the charger was rolled off of him. The voice was so damn familiar. Nick just couldn't put his finger on it…

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" Nick was staring up at a very familiar, bearded face. He glanced at who was standing beside him.

"I thought you were tougher than that, Nick," the bearded man's female companion jabbed. And then it all came flooding back to him.

" _She is so beautiful…she is so beautiful."_

_"You know what? This got me thinkin'. I should totally marry that girl."_

_"Man, oh, man, I jumped Jimmy Gibbs's car through a plate glass window, and I just met the purddiest girl I've ever seen. Nick, shoot me now, brother. Day's never gonna get any better than this."_

_"Hey, Rochelle, now don't spare my feelin's none... You think I got any shot with that Zoey girl?"_

Oh, _fuck_ , no.


	2. Chapter Two

"Thanks so much!  ...Louis, wasn't it?" asked Ellis, smiling up at the man who had rescued him.

"Yeah, that's right," said the thin businessman, grinning as he helped Ellis to his feet. "And it's not a problem. We saw you guys and figured you might need some help."

"We sure did," said Ellis, looking over to where the biker guy, Francis, was helping Rochelle to her feet. He snickered, as Rochelle blushed a bit. He was glad to see that his teammates were okay.

Wait. Where was Nick?

Ellis began to panic. He had heard Nick screaming, as he'd been taken down by the hoard. Oh, God, what if-

"I can manage myself, cupcake."

Oh, good. He was fine. Fine enough to make snarky remarks, at least. _"But, then again,"_ thought Ellis, " _he's always up for that. Wait…is that…"_

"Z-Zoey?" Ellis stuttered, making his way to the woman, attempting to clean out one of Nick's many wounds. She was definitely a beauty. Maybe not as lovely as he had remembered back at the bridge, but definitely lovely.

"Ellis!" Her face lit up. "Long time, no see."

"Yeah," he replied, scratching the back of his neck, face flushing.

"When the two of you are done making out, could y' maybe throw me a med kit?" came Nick's voice from on the ground. Ellis snapped out of his daze instantly, still panicked about Nick's state of health, as he saw the deep, bleeding gash in his side.

"Christ, Nick. I'm so sorry. I shoulda' been helpin' y' out. Now look at you," Ellis felt guilty for not reaching him sooner. He immediately bent down and started cleaning out Nick's wounds.

"Careful, Overalls," Nick cringed, as Ellis dabbed at a cut with an alcohol-soaked cloth.

"I can do it, if you want," Zoey offered. "You know, since he's obviously just going to be an ungrateful jerk to you, Ellis," she glared at Nick.

"Naw, it's okay, Zoey. Nick gets real fussy when anyone heals him. He seems to behave best for me," said Ellis, before Nick could interject. Technically that was true, although Ellis really didn't know why Nick was so patient with him when he needed help. He figured it was to make sure Ellis didn't get his feelings too hurt and refused to help him next time. That was Nick: Being kind to others only if it benefited himself. Although, lately, it hadn't seemed that way.

As a matter of fact, Nick had been much kinder to him over the last month or so. This actually made Ellis quite happy. He hated to admit it, but Ellis adored the older man. Nick was just so _awesome_. At least, that was the word Ellis used to describe Nick. The way the conman could take on a group of special infected without flinching, how he smirked whenever he got his point across, the way he had a sarcastic quip to everything, like he didn't even have to think about it. Nick was just like the slick, morally gray action heroes that Ellis had grown up watching on television, never playing by the rules and always getting results. As a child, Ellis had idolized their every action and word. And indeed, he looked up to Nick quite a lot.

Of course, there were other things, too. Like the way that Nick gently bandaged Ellis when he was hurt, nothing but concern for his hurt teammate in his emerald eyes, and the way he complimented him every time he put in a good shot, or the way his eyes began to shine when Ellis said something that the conman actually considered intelligent. However, Ellis didn't like to think about those things. They made him think in ways he was sure would get him a beating from his friends back in Savannah. Sometimes, he couldn't help himself, though. The moment he had met the stingy conman he knew that there was something special about him. This man had obviously gone through more than the three other survivors combined, things that had hardened him. Ellis was determined right away to start chipping away at Nick's hard exterior to find something a bit softer underneath. He was pretty sure he was close to reaching it.

Ellis remembered one night, after their second helicopter had gone down, he had been so distraught. He had really thought they were going to get out of the infected mess they had been thrown into. He'd kept a smile on his face for most of the journey thus far, trying to keep up the spirits of his less optimistic teammates. But, they'd been rescued so many times before, only to be thrown back to the zombies. He was starting to feel like everything was hopeless. He was tired. Tired of smiling, tired of jokes, and tired of zombies. And so, he just stared ahead, gazing blankly into the flames of the fire one of his teammates had started (he was too emotionally drained to pay attention to which one had made it).  It was then, that Nick had begun to really open himself up to Ellis.

"I know things seem bleak, kid, but, then again, things have been bleak all along," Nick had said, as he sat down beside him, reaching over and grabbing his hand. Ellis might have pulled away, but, as he turned to face Nick, he found that he couldn't bring himself to go a single inch farther from him. He had even had the thought of getting a bit closer rolling around in his mind, as Nick's face contorted with something akin to painful adoration.

"You know that, though, don't you, Overalls?" Nick chuckled weakly. "You're not stupid, and we've all been the morons for not seeing it."

Ellis felt his heart begin to race. It had hurt in a way he'd never even imagined it could, staring up at Nick that night.

"Don't give up, Ellis," Nick had said, "Because God knows that one of us has to keep hope, and it sure as hell ain't ever going to be me."

"I thought you hated each other," said Zoey, breaking Ellis from his memories.

"I don't hate him, Barbie! He just gets on my nerves," hissed Nick, as Ellis tightly wound some gauze around his stomach.

Ellis' head shot up, half in surprise and half in anger, "Don't be treatin' her like that, Nick. If it weren't for her you might be long gone by now!"

"Yeah, because _you_ were so much help," scoffed Nick, obviously angry.

Ellis felt guilt rising up inside of him. He had told Nick that he would save him, and he hadn't. Still, that was no reason to treat an angel like Zoey so rudely. "Why y' gotta be like that, Nick?" snapped Ellis, fighting back tears. There was no way he was going to cry in front of Zoey, he was nervous just talking to her.

"Ellis," came a comforting voice. He looked up to see Zoey's concerned, but angry face. "Don't bother helping him if he's going to act like that. You've healed him enough. He should be able to walk to the safe house and finish bandaging himself."  She offered him a hand.

Ellis gladly took it, feeling his face flush as she helped him to his feet. Her hand was much softer than Ellis had expected. Nick struggled to stand up after him, but managed without too much trouble.

"Careful, Nick," warned Ellis, still trying to be helpful, as Zoey began leading him to the safe house the others had already congregated to.

"Shut-up, Ellis," Nick snapped.  

Zoey gave him a glare as the three went to join up with the others.


	3. Chapter Three

Nick groaned as he opened his eyes the next morning. His wounds were still a bit sore, but he felt much better than he had the previous day. He turned over, and smirked at what he found.

Ellis was still sound asleep on the floor beside him, only inches away. He looked so peaceful, almost as if he were safe, back home in Savannah, no infection, no zombies.

"When did you get here, Sport," whispered Nick affectionately, as he softly swept his hand through the hick's sandy hair, before moving down to stroke his jaw. It wasn't uncommon for Ellis to climb into bed with or find his way beside Nick at night. Nick figured it was nightmares, but had never really asked Ellis about it. He had figured Ellis would find comfort elsewhere now that Zoey was with them. But, the southerner had decided to fall asleep beside Nick, despite that, it seemed.

" _We'll go our separate ways today, anyway,"_ thought Nick, gratefully.  _"And then Overalls' 'angel' and her sidekicks will be long gone,"_ he smiled to himself, as he watched Ellis subconsciously push his face against Nick's caressing hand in a happy nuzzle.

Suddenly, Nick heard a shuffle. He turned to see Louis, who was staring at the two of them in slight bafflement. As Nick glared at him, though, he just shrugged and lumbered off to the kitchen.

" _That's right,"_   thought Nick, sinisterly, _"Tell that bitch when you leave that there's nothing here waiting for her, so there ain't any point in coming back for it."_   He most definitely was not going to give up what he felt he had rightfully earned without a fight. He had earned his shot at this, at _him_. Nick would be damned if he was going to let some girl who'd only exchanged a handful of sentences with Ellis take that away just because she was easy on the eyes and could shoot a gun.

"Time to get up, Overalls," Nick nudged Ellis, as he saw Rochelle groggily stagger out of the room to his left. There were only two bedrooms in the house, and Ellis, being Ellis, insisted that the ladies got them. Nick wasn't sure why they couldn't just share a bed and leave one open for someone else. Ellis groaned, as Nick lightly shook him. He could hear Coach begin to wake from the couch behind him, as Francis still snored away in the armchair beside him.

"Mmm…Mornin', Nick."

A soft, loving smile spread over Nick's features, "Good morning to you, too, Champ."

"Smell coffee…" Ellis muttered, drowsily sitting up. It did smell like coffee. Rochelle or Louis must have found some instant in the kitchen, Nick guessed. God, he loved coffee. It was one of the few luxuries they could still afford in a zombie apocalypse.

"Well, we'd better get some before it's all gone," said Nick, standing. It took Ellis a bit to follow suit in his groggy state, but he managed, eventually.

The conman and hick were greeted by a tired smile from Rochelle and a knowing look from Louis. Nick ignored Louis, hoping that the businessman wouldn't say anything about the tender moment he had witnessed, and, instead, turned to Rochelle. "Any coffee left, Ro?"

"Plenty," she replied, grabbing two mugs down for Nick and Ellis, before settling down at the kitchen table beside Louis. Ellis and Nick proceeded to fill their mugs with boiling water and coffee powder, and sat across from the two, sipping their caffeinated beverages in comfortable, sleepy silence. Nick felt a pair of eyes settle on him, and he knew right away that those eyes belonged to Ellis.

"Nick?" Ellis asked, noticeable hesitance in his voice.

"Hm?"

"Wouldya ever consider getin' married again?"

Nick practically spat his coffee out, beginning to cough as he choked on the liquid. Ellis looked away, face turning pink. Rochelle gave the hick an odd look.

"Why would you ask a question like that, Overalls? Thinking about proposing?" he joked, giving the embarrassed southerner a wink.

"N-no. Uhcourse not! I was just wonderin'-"

"Hey, anyone want any jerky?" called a voice. Francis entered the room, holding a large bag of what looked to be homemade beef jerky. "I found a ton of the stuff downstairs!"

"I hope that stuff was made before the infection," commented Nick, as the biker passed the bag to Ellis, who hastily bit into the dried meat, thankful to have a reason to keep his mouth shut for once.

"Or at least made out of an animal," chuckled Francis. He shot Rochelle an apologetic look when she declined the bag from Ellis.

Zoey and Coach entered the kitchen next. The room had begun to feel a little too crowded for Nick's taste, despite the fact that the kitchen was a decent size. Zoey made herself some coffee and plopped down beside Ellis, grabbing a strip of jerky and tearing into it.

"So, we talked it over last night," said Zoey, turning to Rochelle, "And we'd like to stick together, if you don't mind having us."

Nick's jaw dropped. She couldn't be serious.

Ellis' eyes lit up, "'Course we don't mind, Zoey! We'd love t' have y' on the team!"

Rochelle smiled at Francis, "Well, it definitely wouldn't hurt to have more guns on our side."

"We're all headed up to Nebraska, anyway, right?" asked Coach.

"Yup!" replied Zoey. "That's where we've heard there's a CEDA camp, anyway."

This could not be fucking happening. They were supposed to get _rid_ of these parasites today, not welcome them permanently!

"Hold on a goddamn minute!" snapped Nick, shooting up from his seat at the table. "This was not the plan!  e can scarcely watch our own backs! How are we supposed to watch three more! We'll be dead before tomorrow!"

"Hey, that's not fair, Nick!" said Ellis, standing up, as well, "These guys have helped us out a lot, y'know!"

"We could always leave _you_ behind, boy," warned Coach, giving Nick an angry look. Nick knew they would never do anything of the sort, but the remark still pissed him off.

"I'm just saying," growled Nick, "We're in a lot more danger this way."

"I'm sorry that _you_ don't like us, Nick," said Zoey, glaring daggers at the conman, "But _we_ all like each other."

Nick snorted. " _We meaning you, and each other meaning Ellis,"_ Nick thought, angrily.

Louis cleared his throat, and Nick fell silent, knowing the leverage Louis could have over him.

"Nick, I get where you're coming from," he said, "We lost a teammate, so we know how protective you must feel over the lives of Rochelle, Ellis, and Coach. But you have to understand that we're _all_ teammates now, and we're going to protect one another.  I've got your back, man. Promise." he put a hand on Nick's shoulder. Damn, that Louis was good with words. Definitely a salesman of some kind before the end of the world had started.

He looked over to Ellis, who looked back, eyes hopeful. He just couldn't say no to the kid, could he? Even if it meant throwing away something that made himself feel better.

"Fine," sighed Nick. "I'm in."

Ellis smiled at him, giving Nick a brief glimpse of joy, before the hick turned back to Zoey.

"So, I guess that makes us partners, Zoey," grinned Ellis, nervously holding out his hand.

"I guess it does, partner!" she replied in a pretend southern accent, smiling as she shook Ellis' hand.

_Oh God, what have I signed up for?_


	4. Chapter Four

It had not been a good day.

Ellis had woken up alone that morning. Perhaps it seemed a stupid reason to consider it a bad start to the day. Waking up alive was a good enough thing in a zombie apocalypse, but he felt so empty, waking up without Nick there. But Nick had locked himself up in one of the bedrooms for the night, after he had gotten in an argument with Coach about who would carry what the next day. The night had been restless with paranoia without him.

Zoey had done her best to comfort him, talking to him about everything from cars to horror films, until she eventually fell asleep from exhaustion. It was kind of like a sleep over, Ellis thought. He still was a bit nervous when talking to her, like back when he had a crush on a pretty girl in elementary school, but he was definitely less nervous than before. They had become pretty close friends over the last few days, actually, sharing funny thoughts and jokes while they moved onward. She really was kind to him, and he was grateful for kindness, seeing as everyone had been extremely tense since the groups had merged. Joy or playing around was next to zero as of late. Ellis missed the loving, family-like moments the group used to share together.

They hadn't eaten anything that morning either, seeing as the safe house was void of any food. Ellis could feel the empty ache in the pit of his stomach, as he trudged down the highway, shooting any infected that came his way. And they definitely came his way.

"Jockey!" Ellis shouted in warning, as one of the creepy, little infected scuttled out from behind an abandoned truck.

"Watch it!"

Ellis' attention turned from the jockey to Francis, who had just killed a hunter that had been about ready to pounce on the hick. The biker grunted as he kicked the dead hunter in the head, satisfied with his kill.

"Holy shit, man!" exclaimed Ellis, "Thanks for that."

"Ellis!" the southerner heard Zoey yell in alarm, as a shot rang out from her direction.

He looked to see the jockey from before bleeding out at his feet. He had gotten distracted, and had almost paid dearly for it. He looked to Zoey, who was shaking her head at him, good-humoredly.

"Thanks, Zoey," his face flushed in embarrassment.

"What are friends for?" she smiled, as he caught up to her.

"Dammit, pay better attention to what's trying to kill you, Overalls," Nick snapped, heading up the group.

"It's a little hard when all of the zombies seem to go straight for me, Nick!" said Ellis, defensively.  It was true, the majority of special infected they had encountered that day seemed to have locked onto Ellis. He had already killed two chargers, four smokers, a hunter, and a spitter, all in a handful of hours. Just another part of why the day had been so horrible.

"They attack all of us, Overalls. We're not almost getting offed every time we turn around," Nick's voice was thick with annoyance. The conman had been noticeably irritable for the last four days, ever since Louis, Zoey, and Francis had joined their group.

"What's your problem, man?" snapped Francis, marching up and cutting Nick off, standing in front of him. The whole group stopped.

"That's how he always is, Francis. Ain't no sense gettin' too upset over it," said Ellis, running to the two men, hoping to avoid any extended conflict. They were already fighting for their lives, the last thing they needed was members of the group out to get one another.

"I don't believe that," chuckled Francis, darkly. "Back when we met you on that bridge, he was a prick, sure. But he sure as hell wasn't _this_ pissy."

Ellis couldn't help but admit that Francis was right. Nick wasn't usually nearly as vicious as he had been lately. It was obviously because of the additional people around. He seemed to get along with Louis just fine, but Francis and Zoey were another story entirely, and it had begun to rile the entire group.

"Maybe I wouldn't be in such a bad mood if I didn't have your _stench_ hanging around all of the time, Greaseball!" shouted Nick.

"Oh that's real cute. You're givin' _me_ nicknames now!" said Francis, angrily.

"Maybe I am, asswipe! What are you gonna do about it?"

Then, in one swift move, Francis' fist collided with Nick's jaw, forcing the conman onto his backside. That didn't stop him from jumping right back up and returning the favor, though.

Panic began to pulse through Ellis' body, as Francis began hammering multiple blows to Nick's stomach and face, enraged. The hick froze up, horror eating away at his insides.He was tempted to pull out his gun and shoot Francis, the same way he would a hunter, as the infected creature tore at his friend's flesh. It wasn't long until the two were on the ground, messily throwing punches and kicks at one another. Judging by how hard Nick's punches were, despite how few Francis let him get in, Ellis figured that Francis was very lucky that Nick had lost his rings along their journey. Then, one of Francis' punches drew blood. It was then that Ellis' body unfroze itself and reacted.

"STOP!" Ellis finally shouted, shoving Francis off of Nick with extreme, adrenaline-fueld force. Francis looked up at him, surprised at his outburst.

" _DON'T TOUCH HIM! DON'T YOU EVER TOUCH HIM!"_  

The biker continued to look up at the hick in shock, as Ellis stood protectively in front of Nick  If looks could kill, Francis would have probably died in a fiery blaze.

"Ellis…" Ellis heard Nick's voice from behind him, coming out in a surprised squeak.

"Stay back, Nick," said Ellis, protective anger in his voice, unwavering. He stood his ground, as Francis stood.

"Look, kid, I'm sorry if I got out of hand. Bastard just pisses me off," apologized Francis, flashing them both a smile that was only half cocky.

"I don't care," said Ellis, continuing to stand his ground, despite the embarrassment from finally noticing that all of his companions' eyes were on him, "You can't just go punchin' anyone who pisses you off."

Ellis felt pressure on his shoulder, and he turned his head to see that Nick had stood up behind him. "It's okay, Fireball. He's not used to things like civility, growing up in a cave."

"Nick…" groaned Ellis, knowing exactly where things were going. Why did he have to be so difficult all of the damn time?

"For God's sake, Nick!" snapped Rochelle, fed up with the conman, as she marched up to the three men. "You're thirty-six! It's time to get over petty playground squabbles!"

Ellis nodded vigorously, thankful for Rochelle's timely intervention.

Francis laughed, as Nick gritted his teeth in irritation, but said nothing in retort.

"And _you!"_   snapped Rochelle, turning to Francis, dark eyes furious. "You're old enough to know better than to provoke someone who could have your life in his hands fifteen seconds from now.  _Grow up._ "

"Goddamn idiots," grumbled Coach. "Surprised you didn't attract every effin' zombie in a ten mile radius."

The three men went completely silent. All of the fighting and screaming really had been reckless. It was clear how guilty they all were feeling. They had put their teammates in danger so carelessly.

"'M sorry, ya'll," said Ellis, finally.

"What's important is nobody got hurt," said Louis, optimistically.

Nick pointed to his swelling, bloodied lip, "You were saying?"

Francis began to laugh heartily, followed by Zoey and Coach not long after. Suddenly, they were all in higher spirits, the thick tension that had been haunting them all quickly swept away, laughing over the stupidity of the recent incident.  Even Nick smirked a little.


	5. Chapter Five

It was almost midnight, and Nick still hadn't fallen asleep. He had retired to a pile of sheets on the living room floor of the safe house, his back to the kitchen entryway, staring at the blank wall opposite him. The only light came from the candle Louis had lit in the kitchen.

Nick had to admit, the new team members were starting to grow on him. Louis was a really compassionate guy, it turned out. A little on the quirky side, maybe, but he hadn't ratted out Nick's affections to Ellis yet, and that was good enough for him. He had kind of become the older brother of the group. Francis wasn't so bad either, despite his violent tendencies. To be honest, Nick had gained a decent amount of respect for the biker after their little street tussle. The guy could hit, and hit hard. On top of that, it had turned out that Francis wasn't half-bad at poker either, which was more than Nick could say for Coach, Rochelle, or Ellis. Zoey…well it was hard to pin how Nick felt about Zoey. He hated her, of course, but he knew his reasoning for that hatred probably wasn't quite fair. It really wasn't her fault that Ellis would be more interested in cute college girls, than a conman in his thirties. No. The reason he wasn't sure how to feel about her was because he didn't understand her. Who _was_ she, really? Sure, the girl could shoot, but when it came to who she really was, her personality, all of that cheesy bullshit that made her distinct? She seemed like such a blank slate. He could have seen Ellis having feelings for Rochelle - she was beautiful, brilliant, wickedly funny and brash. But Zoey? There was no way Ellis was falling for Miss Generic Girl, was there?  Or was there something Nick just wasn't getting.

Nick sighed, irritably, as loud laughter came from the kitchen.

"God, Ellis, you're so funny!" Nick heard Zoey giggle.

"Heh, thanks, Zoey, but I really don't see how almost gettin' eaten by a lion is all that funny," replied Ellis, who had just finished one of his stories revolving around one of he and his friend Keith's misadventures.

"But you got out alive," Zoey pointed out. Nick could practically hear the huge smile on her face. He snarled in disgust.

"I've got outta 'lotta things alive," Ellis said, voice chipper, "I'm getting through somethin' right now, and I ain't dead."

"That's true," Nick heard Louis interject. "We're all going through something pretty big, but we'll all get out of it okay."

"I think so, too Louis," said Ellis. "We have each other, after all. As long as the seven of us stick together, I know we'll make it out."

"We really have saved each other's asses," laughed Zoey.

Suddenly, everything went quiet, no laughter or voices. Nick was about to actually get up and see if anything had gone wrong, before Ellis finally spoke.

"You're thinkin' about him, aren't you? The guy you lost before you first met us."

"Yeah," Louis' voice came, with a hint of sadness. "His name was Bill. He was a good guy."

"He was a hero," added Zoey, softly.

Nick heard one of the chairs push back and someone take a few steps.

"'M sure he was, Zoey.  He must of been one hell of a guy," said Ellis.

There was a moment of silence before Zoey replied. "Thanks, Ellis."

Nick's stomach turned painfully. He didn't exactly know what was going on in there, but he wouldn't doubt it if Ellis and Zoey we're getting a little too close. A second later, he mentally kicked himself for caring more about that than Zoey and Louis' fallen friend. They were in mourning, and all he could think about was his love life. He really was just as shitty as Zoey said he was.

"Ellis?" Nick heard Louis ask.

"Yeah?"

"How do you feel about Nick?"

Nick froze, heart suddenly pounding. Why would Louis bring that subject up then of all times? Nick's stomach dropped sickeningly. Did Ellis just kiss Zoey in that moment of silence? Is that why Louis wanted to know? Did he actually think that Ellis and Nick were an item?

"I dunno how t' answer that, Louis. He's kind of the best thing that ever happened to me."

Nick let out a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding. What was Ellis implying? Did he…? He couldn't. Could he?

"He might not wanna admit it, but we're pretty much best friends at this point. Never thought I'd say that," Nick heard the southerner laugh. "But he's real important to me. I don't think I'd function too well if he were to run off on us or get killed."

The last part of his sentence sounded very solemn, and Nick felt his chest tighten with adoration and sadness. He had no clue that the kid thought that highly of him.  

"I dunno what it is, really. I've gone through my fair share with Ro and Coach, but it seems like I've gone through the most with Nick. I'd pick him first to be on my side any day."  Nick could hear Ellis' wide grin, even if he couldn't see it.

Nick smiled, as he settled down again, much more comfortable, and ready to drift to sleep. That was before Ellis decided to ask Louis and Zoey a question of his own.

"What do you guys think about him?  I mean, I know he leaves a bad impression at first, but we've all been together for almost two weeks, now."

"He's…different," replied Louis, not unkindly, "But I definitely can see some good in him." Nick was thankful that he had left it at that.

Zoey laughed, "Well you've got the 'different' part right, but I'm not so sure about the 'good' part."

"Why'd you say that, Zoey?" asked Ellis. "He really is a decent guy, when you get to know him."

"No offense, Ellis. I trust you, Rochelle, and Coach completely. Especially you."  Nick rolled his eyes. "But Nick's just another story. I mean, what did he even do for a living before all of this?"

"Conned people outta their money at casinos…" replied Ellis, a little downtrodden. "He got inna lotta other trouble, too, I reckon. But that don't change my opinion of him none. I think his heart's changed. At least a bit."

"Ellis, that's what cons do. They lie and trick you into believing that they're something that they're not. I mean, I'll protect him as long as he has my back, but I'm pretty sure that as soon as we reach CEDA, he'll make sure to be out of our lives forever. All of ours," said Zoey, gently.

The room went silent again, and Nick's innards twisted with violent agony. At first, sure, he wasn't even planning on staying with the group as soon as he got out of that hotel in Georgia. But now he couldn't imagine his life without his friends, his little makeshift family. They were all he had left. It wasn't like a life of fortune and luxury could await anyone during or right after a zombie apocalypse, anyway. He didn't come off as _that_ ungrateful and horrible at that point, did he?

"I don't know, Zoey," said Louis, carefully, "I have a feeling he'll be sticking around for quite awhile."

"Why? He has no reason to," Zoey sniffed.

"I just think Ellis knows what he's talking about when it comes to Nick. A lucky guess, you might say."

"I dunno, Louis," said Ellis, Nick's gut twisting even more painfully, "Zoey's probably right, he will try and shake us off. The problem with that is that I won't let him."

Nick chuckled at the hick's words, some of his tension easing off.  Of course Ellis wouldn't let him just go that easily.  He was Ellis, after all.

"You boys are crazy," said Zoey, as Nick heard a chair scooting back. "But I suppose, not even Nick could say no to Ellis if he's persistent enough."

"That's for sure," said Louis. Thankfully, only Nick seemed to catch the hint in his voice.

"Well, I'm off to bed. Zoey, wake Francis and Rochelle when it's their turn to take watch," instructed Louis.

"Alright. Goodnight!" called Zoey.

"Night."

Nick pretended to be asleep, as Louis entered the room and got into the sleeping bag a yard or two away.

"Man, you've sure got yourself one dedicated man," said Louis to the "sleeping" Nick. Nick wasn't so sure, though, as Ellis continued to blatantly flirt back and forth with Zoey throughout the night.

Nick listened, as they prattled on about Zoey's favorite movies (it turned out she had been rather fond of horror films before the apocalypse), and Georgia sunsets, and how, of course, Ellis would _have_ to take her to see one after this whole mess was over, and about high school teachers, and deer, and Keith. The pit in Nick's stomach just got deeper and deeper with every new subject, and every time Ellis would stutter nervously, or Zoey would giggle. When it was time for them to wake Rochelle and Francis, Nick was half sure that the hick would follow her to her room for the night. And it turned out, he was right.

The conman felt tears, something very uncommon for him, begin to prick at his eyes, as an overwhelming amount of pathetic jealousy began to envelop him. God, why had he been so stupid? It wasn't like Ellis cared about him more than a friend. And Zoey was adorable, and inviting, and…well, had a vagina. He knew that he should have given up the moment that that moronic little college girl showed up.

Then he heard a noise, and suddenly, something happily pressed against his back.

"Aww, isn't that cute," Nick heard Rochelle's voice from across the room. Nick sighed, half with joy, and half with self-resentment for getting so worked up. Of course Ellis had gone with her to wake up Rochelle. He was too much of a gentleman to speed things up that quickly. He heard Francis softly laugh, as Ellis nuzzled Nick's shoulder. Pretending to be asleep, Nick turned over, and slowly pulled Ellis close, so that his head was resting on Nick's chest. Ellis didn't seem to mind at all. And, with that, Nick finally managed to fall asleep.


	6. Chapter Six

Ellis didn't want to open his eyes. He was just too goddamn happy. Warmth seeped into his bones, as he pressed himself closer to the body beside him. He sighed contently, feeling the arms of his friend tighten around him.

 _"This has been going on for long enough_ ," thought Ellis, as he sighed a less-content sigh, " _All of this cuddling, and flirting, and bickering. Either something has to happen…"_ Ellis bit his lip in frustration. " _Or something has to stop."_

Slowly, he opened his eyes, to see Nick's sleeping face. The older man had a soft, content smile on his face. Ellis could feel his heart warm, as he gently stroked his companion's jawline. Nick seemed happy for once, even if he was sleeping. And that was good enough for Ellis. He had done that. Ellis had made Nick happy.

_Unless he's dreaming of winning some bet and finding some lady to…_

He didn't want to finish the thought. It put a sour taste in his mouth.

_"Ellis, that's what cons do. They lie and trick you into believing that they're something that they're not."_

"… _as soon as we reach CEDA, he'll make sure to be out of our lives forever. All of ours."_

Zoey's words kept ringing in his head, as he stared at the sleeping Nick, who's soft smile had suddenly vanished. Ellis shut his eyes tightly, still stroking Nick's face. He didn't want Nick to leave. He couldn't take it if he just abandoned them, after all they had gone through. He _belonged_ with them. With _him_. There was no way Nick could just leave. Ellis had faith in his friend. In the man he…well he wasn't sure of anything, and there was no point in thinking about it. He was raised proper, and there was no room for the feelings he may or may not have for Nick in the upbringing his mama had given. And even if he decided to throw all of that away, he wasn't sure what would happen if he decided to…. Well Nick was just so complicated….

 _But these feelings are_ _real_ _. I know they are. And something has to give. We just can't go on like this. It could put everyone in danger._

His hand froze, and he slowly retracted it after some time, searing tears pricking at his eyes as he pulled away from Nick and sat up.

_Which means it has to stop. It has to stop now. God, it has to stop._

A single tear made its way down Ellis' face, and he began to shake.

"Good morning."

Letting out a yelp of surprise, Ellis snatched his cap from the ground, and shoved it on his head, tilting it to cover his teary eyes. It had been Zoey who had interrupted his private, heartbreaking moment. He had never been happier to see her.

"'Mornin' beautiful lady," he smiled up at her. He the stood and walked over to her. Nick subconsciously began feeling around the floor, presumably searching for Ellis. When he found the spot to be completely empty, the conman moved over to where Ellis had been sleeping, soaking in the left-over warmth from the hick, as he slept.

Zoey glanced over at Nick, distastefully. Ellis couldn't bear to look.

"Want to go see what's for breakfast?" she asked after a moment. A wave of relief came over Ellis. Food was always a great way to get his mind off of things.

"Love to," Ellis grinned, following her to the kitchen. The chairs were still pulled out, and the coffee mugs were still on the table from the previous night's table talk. Ellis stared at the furniture blankly, thinking about the conversation. It was clear that Zoey didn't trust Nick. But she did have a good reason. He hadn't exactly been all that kind to her since the two teams of survivors became one. She also hadn't gone through as much with him as Ellis had. One person she did clearly trust, however, was Ellis. She was a good friend. She listened to him and protected him, even if some of her protection seemed a little unfounded to Ellis. He grinned slightly, remembering the night they had first met at the bridge. She had looked like an absolute angel to Ellis that day. Perhaps he did go a little overboard, gushing over her the whole day long while Rochelle, Nick, and Coach listened. But it had simply been wonderful to talk to a woman his own age. And she was really pretty, he couldn't deny that. Maybe his situation wouldn't be too hard to get out of, after all.

"Cereal or Poptarts?"

Ellis turned to see Zoey smiling, holding a box of Frosted Flakes in one hand, and blueberry toaster pastries in the other.

"Hm. You know, that's a really tough choice," he said. "What would the chef suggest?"

"The 'chef' would suggest the thing that's not out of date," Zoey chuckled, tossing a package of the toaster pastries to the southerner.

Ellis already felt a little better, as Zoey sat across from him, and they tore into their meager meals together.

"So, are you ready to go out there and finally get to safety?" she asked him, as she crumpled up her wrapper.

"I'm ready to kick ass!" said Ellis, excitedly. Honestly, traveling miles on foot while constantly being in danger was the last thing he wanted. He could definitely go for shooting a few zombies, though, to take his mind off of personal frustrations.

Zoey smiled at him. It was an absolutely radiant smile. It reminded him of a really beautiful girl he had liked in high school. He couldn't remember her name, but he remembered her long, blond curls, and the way she had always smiled at him in the hallway. She had smelled like lilac, too. He bet Zoey smelled like lilac when she wasn't covered in dirt and zombie blood. Suddenly, he could feel a blush spreading across his face, and he coughed in slight embarrassment.

Then, the two looked up to see Francis, Rochelle, and Coach entering the room. Without uttering a word, Francis grabbed for the cereal, and tipped the box, pouring the stale sugariness into his mouth.

"Mornin'," greeted Coach, grabbing a package of toaster pastries and sitting beside Ellis.

"Mornin', Coach!" said Ellis, cheerily, "Mornin' Ro, Francis!"

Rochelle tiredly nodded, and Francis grunted into the cereal box.

"Hey! Can't you save some of that for someone else?" Rochelle snapped, glaring at Francis.

The biker lowered the box and handed it over, apologetically. "Of course. Sorry, Rochelle."

Zoey raised an eyebrow in surprise, and chuckled a little bit, "Wow, Francis. I never pegged you for the gentleman type, considering what a dick you are around me and Louis."

"I just know how to treat a real lady," he retorted.

"What about me?" she asked, pretending to be offended, just as Nick and Louis quietly entered the room.

"You ain't no lady, Zoey. You're just a snot-nosed little brat."

"I think she's quite the lady," Ellis interjected. The room went quiet, and Coach smirked a little. Nick looked horrified.

"I mean it," said Ellis hurriedly, "'Sides, there might only be two women left, right. So we'd oughta respect 'em."

Zoey smiled, "See Francis? Ellis knows how to treat a woman."  She stood and offered Ellis her arm. He looped his with hers, and tipped his hat to her.

"Shall we?"  he smirked.

"I think so," she smiled back. And with that, the two left the room to load their guns for the day.

Louis glanced over at Nick, as the two strolled out of the kitchen. He had a scowl on his face, but the conman kept himself cool for the most part. Sighing, the businessman made his way to the cupboard under the sink, hoping to find something useful. He rummaged through a few tools, flower vases, and rags, until something black and cylinder caught his eye.

"Guys, look what I found!" he called. Ellis stuck his head beck in the kitchen, as the other survivors gathered around. Louis had found a pair of binoculars. Ellis' excitement immediately peaked.

"You know what this means?" He asked, excitedly. When everyone was silent, he continued, "It means we can scout for dangers and supplies early! It'll save us a lot of time, you gotta admit."

"That is a really good idea," admitted Rochelle, as Louis handed the binoculars to Ellis.

"Be careful with those, Sport," said Nick, gently. Ellis paid no mind to him, despite the tingling sensation that ran down his spine at hearing Nick's voice for the first time that morning.

"I think I should go out and scope out the place before we go out for the day," said Ellis.

"No," argued Nick, immediately, "You're not going out there by yourself, Ellis.  It's too dangerous."

Ellis glared at Nick. He wasn't really mad at Nick, but he wanted to be. It was the only way he was ever going to start getting over this… _thing_ that had started between the two of them. "What, Nick? You don't think I can handle it?"

"It's not like that, Ellis. I just don't want you to-"

"Since when do you get to decide what I do, anyway, fancypants?" Ellis cut him off.

Nick's eyebrows knit together in hurt confusion, "Ellis-"

"I'm going. End of story." He glared defiantly at Nick. The other team members stared at them.

"Okay," sighed Nick, taking a step toward Ellis, reaching out, about to put a hand on Ellis' shoulder, "But at least-"

"Let me come with you," interjected Zoey, poking her head into the kitchen, "I'll watch your back while you're out there."

"Good idea," said Ellis, blandly, turning his back on Nick, whose face clearly bore emotional pain. Ellis' stomach felt like it was in knots, as Zoey slung a shotgun over her shoulder and they began to head for the door. He felt like he had made a terrible mistake. Nick wasn't arguing with him or pushing him away, as previously planned. He just looked hurt.

"I'm coming too, Ellis."

Ellis stopped at the safe house door, hearing Nick's stern, slightly angry voice.

"I'm not sure we need you, Nick. Zoey's a pretty sharp shooter," said Ellis, sounding emotionless, despite the heaviness settling in his chest. 

"I know she is, kid. But you're getting extra protection whether you like it or not," insisted Nick, even more emotionless sounding.

"Let's just get going," said Zoey, "Otherwise it'll be noon by the time we all head out."

And with that, the group of three opened the door to Hell.


	7. Chapter Seven

Nick made sure to stick close to Ellis, as the three survivors made their way from the safe house to a nearby building that looked as if it might have been a storage shack at one point. Zoey had pinpointed it as the safest location for the three of them to scope out their surroundings. The whole way there, the group had stayed bitterly silent. Nick was starting to grow incredibly weary of Ellis' behavior. One day he'd be ornery and snappish with Nick, and the next he wouldn't leave the conman alone. He was emotionally exhausted. At that point he figured it would be better just to make his priorities simpler. One: Survive, Two: Protect Ellis, whatever the cost. That was it. Nick wasn't about to drown out his feelings for his teammate over petty arguments and Ellis' new-found lady friend.  That would mess him up too much, and he had already been fucked over enough by his jealousy in recent weeks.  He had learned by that point that suppressing his emotions, from himself at least, would only cause a build-up and explosion. He didn't need jealousy and confusion clouding his judgment during a goddamn apocalypse. No. Instead he'd just protect the kid, silently. Ellis was his friend, and he didn't want to lose that friendship just because he disliked Zoey and her position of power over Ellis. So, in that moment, he had promised himself to keep his tongue tied on matters concerning Ellis' choices, as long as they didn't put anyone in mortal danger. This would have been a completely insane vow for someone as opinionated and blunt as Nick, but at that point, he truly felt it would be more of a chore to continue his usual snarkiness about the situation. He was just so worn down.

"I've been thinkin'," whispered Ellis, as the three crouched behind the abandoned building, "I feel like we've come across more zombies since the infection started, than I've encountered people in my whole life."

"What do you mean?" asked Zoey.

"Well," elaborated Ellis, "I mean, we've fought on a'lotta different kinds of terrain. Swamps, forests, even through a carnival. But what I don't get is why people were even in some'uh those places to begin with. Like in the middle of the swamps. I mean, a few, maybe, but enough to make hoards?"

Nick hummed quietly in thought. Ellis was right; there had been hundreds of infected in places most sane people would try to avoid in most cases. However, the Green Flu was not most cases, and while Nick supposed while he was out looking for his next lucky break during the first few weeks of the infection, a lot of people were trying to hole up in the most remote locations possible. He would have voiced this thought, but Ellis was already staring out at the street half a mile away with his binoculars.  

"See anything?" Nick asked cautiously.

"Not yet," replied Ellis, noticeably jumping a bit at the sound of Nick's voice, "Maybe we just cleared the majority outta the area yesterday."

"I don't know if we could be that lucky," remarked Nick.

"It would be nice for a change, though," said Zoey, "And I don't sense anything either."

"I know. But that's what worries me. Things are harder to kill when you can't see them," replied Nick, looking around, finding their surroundings just as bare as Ellis and Zoey had.

"Maybe if we split up we might have better luck scouting," said Ellis.

"No way, Ellis," Nick curtly snapped, "This was supposed to be a quick lookout mission, nothing more. The last thing we need is someone getting hurt with no one to watch our backs."

Ellis looked like he was about to retort, when Zoey cut in, "Nick is right. We don't want any mishaps."

As much as Nick disliked Zoey, he was glad for her intervention. Arguments with Ellis about responsibility and carefulness were not things he was willing to deal with at the moment. He nodded at her and turned back to Ellis, "Maybe we should head out an extra half a mile and then come back with whatever report we have."

"Alright," replied Ellis dryly, as he readjusted his pack. Nick was fairly sure he heard Ellis' voice crack a bit.

"Need a drink?" Nick asked, offering the hick his water bottle.

"I'm fine!" Ellis snapped, far more rushed than necessary. Nick and Zoey both stared at him, eyebrows raised in alarm. Nick had an inkling of what was going on, and felt his heart drop into his stomach. Was Ellis acting like this because he had conflicting emotions about him? If so, all he had to do was say so, and Nick would have been more than happy to sooth Ellis' worries, and assure him that, if he wanted, only positive things would come of them. But he couldn't be sure, could he? Nick was usually good at realizing these things, but as of recent, his opinion of himself hadn't exactly been the highest, especially when he felt like he was losing the most important person in his life to someone who seemed so common to him.

"Ellis..." Zoey reached out to the southerner, and Nick looked away, attempting to look for zombies on the horizon.

"I'm fine, really," Ellis smiled clasping Zoey's hands in his, smiling up at her. Nick felt a lump begin to form in his throat.

"Well, let's go, then." The two younger survivors made a noise in agreement, and they began to walk, making sure to be as quiet as possible, sticking to the shadows whenever possible. Still their path seemed fairly empty. That was, until Nick heard a groaning sound coming from a thick wooded area to his left.

"Hold up guys, I think I found something," warned Nick, holding up his hand.

"Do you think we should check it out or go back an' warn the others?" asked Ellis.

"The sound, it seemed kind of low to be common infected, don't you think?" asked Zoey.

"Definitely," replied Nick, taking a few steps closer to the sound, before stopping again. "I think we should probably turn back."

"Well it's not crying, so it's probably not a witch. Maybe it would be better to take care of it now," said Zoey.

Nick didn't argue.  He didn't have the energy to, and it wasn't making enough ruckus to be a tank. So, cautiously, he stepped in front of Ellis, and he and Zoey began to creep toward the noise in the trees.

"HOLY-!"

Ellis' warning came too late, as a sharp, bellowing shriek echoed throughout the forest, and a charger came rushing at the three survivors.

"Okay, bad idea," remarked Zoey, taking a quick step back.

"We need to run, NOW!" shouted Nick. He wasn't sure if he was ready to take on a charger with just the three of them, especially since the ammo supply in the safe house had been so meager. They had only brought a couple of rounds with them.

"Too late!" shouted Ellis, letting the binoculars hang from his neck and pulling out his pistol.

Zoey and Nick too lifted their guns, and viciously shot at the charger, running backwards in a disorderly fashion, as to not get pummeled.  he charger, while it could not grab the survivors, was much faster than most of the chargers they had previously encountered. Before they knew it, the special infected had run behind them, and the person it went for first was Ellis.

"Oh no you don't!" hissed Nick, knocking Ellis out of the charger's way with his shoulder. He, of course, payed the price for his actions, as the charger grabbed a hold of him and forced him to the ground, pummeling and strangling the conman. Suddenly, he heard a cracking sound, and his leg felt like it was being crushed. He glanced down to see the gigantic monster stepping on his left leg. He let out a scream, as the pain coursed through his body, the charger continuing to slam it's fists into his head and chest.  He heard a shout coming from behind him that sounded like Zoey, as the charger attempted to pick him up, but failing to do so, as it was still standing on his leg. Angrily, it began to pull harder at Nick's torso and he cried out in intense pain. It felt as if he were about to be torn apart.

Suddenly, gunshots rang out, and the tearing feeling stopped, and the special infected collapsed on top of Nick. He groaned in pain, shoving the dead charger off of him. Looking up, he saw Zoey and Ellis, both noticeably relieved to see him alive, running towards him.  Ellis was clearly tearing up.

"You're alive!" Ellis cried, kneeling in the grass beside the bleeding conman.

"Barely," grunted Nick, clutching Ellis' shoulder as he attempted to sit up.

"That could have been me," Ellis commented solemnly, helping Nick up, only to realize that Nick could no longer use his left leg. Looking down, the southerner cringed and hissed at the sight of it. The amount of blood soaking through Nick's pants was not okay.

"I think my leg's broke," whimpered Nick, leaning against Ellis for support.  Ellis pressed his forehead to Nick's cheek, fear clouding his eyes.

"Let me see," requested Zoey. Nick didn't argue, and Ellis helped him to sit on the ground again so that Zoey could roll up his pant leg. "Nothing is sticking out, but there's a lot of blood. I also wouldn't rule out a fracture," she said grimly, "We won't be going anywhere today, but we need to get you back, before you lose more blood."

"I'll carry you," said Ellis, quickly, as Zoey rolled his pant leg back down.

"You probably weigh less than I do, Overalls," remarked Nick, as he struggled to stand.

"You're taller than me, not stronger," Ellis smirked halfheartedly and flexed, "You can ride on my back."

Nick sighed, "Alright. But try not to drop me. I have a feeling that if I go down hard enough I'll be going down for good."

"You'll be okay, Nick, I promise." Ellis' eyes showed, full of sorrow, fear, and regret.

"I trust you, Ellis," Nick comforted, wrapping his arms around Ellis' neck, as the hick lifted him onto his back.

"Alright, move out?" asked Zoey, looking at the two men.

"Yeah, let's head back," said Ellis.


	8. Chapter Eight

Ellis could feel his stomach squirm all the way back to the safe house. They were supposed to move out as soon as the trio got back, but with Nick's leg, not much movement could be achieved. The entire mess was his fault and he knew it. If he had just dealt with his feelings like a reasonable adult, instead of like a fourteen-year-old, they wouldn't have been in that mess at all. The trek back was long and quiet, and once the three survivors had finally reached the safe house, Ellis let Zoey do the explaining.

"What the hell happened?" asked Coach, helping Ellis lay Nick down on the tattered couch.

"A charger," replied Zoey, as she handed him a pack of gauze, "It was pretty clear, but then it just came out of nowhere."

Ellis cringed. It had been his idea to go scouting, after all. It seemed like a good one, too; until Nick had gotten pummeled.

"Well this is just great," grumbled Coach.

"So we're stuck here another day?" asked Francis, irritably.

"Maybe more," commented Zoey. Nick hissed as Coach pulled the last bandage tightly around his leg, "This looks pretty bad."

"We have enough food to survive a few more days here," Rochelle commented, cutting off Francis' loud groan, "But we need to be careful about ammo, because we don't have much."

Nick sat up with difficulty, "Just give me a few hours," he said. "I'll be fine. You know how fast these medkits work."

"Oh no," snapped Coach, pushing Nick back down onto the couch, "You're staying right here. I'll be the judge of when you can move again."

Nick snarled, "You heard Rochelle, we need to move to somewhere there's ammo stockpiled. We'll waste it during watch if we stay here too long!"

"We'll waste it saving your ass repeatedly if you go out in that condition," retorted Coach, lumbering menacingly above Nick. "Just listen to me for once, alright?"

Nick groaned, turning away from his team, clearly frustrated.

"He's right, you know," said Louis. "The less you resist, the quicker you'll heal, and we can move on. So just rest, okay?"

"Yeah," grumbled Nick, leaning his head back. He looked so tired. Ellis could feel his heart sinking in his chest.

One by one, the survivors left the room to allow Nick to rest. All except Ellis, that was. The southerner just stood there, mouth half open, trying to come up with the right words to say. Nick had gone along with his plan, saved his life, and put up with his crap, and all he had gotten for it was an injury.

"You okay, Fireball?" Ellis lifted his head to see Nick looking at him, concerned.

"Me?" blurted Ellis, "You shouldn't be worrin' about me right now," Ellis' voice cracked, and he could feel his throat choke up with emotion.

"Ah, kid," Nick sighed, lovingly but exhaustive. He looked so worn out and broken, almost as if on his death bed. Ellis began to shake, and he tensed up, trying not to cry.

"Don't," whispered Nick, forcing himself to sit up again, "Ellis, everything is fine."

"N…no-"

"Yes," Nick reached out, offering Ellis his hand. Ellis took it immediately, desperate for forgiveness. "CEDA has some of the best medical supplies in the world. You know that. I'll be back to normal in a couple days."

Nick was right. Ellis knew he was, but that didn't change how horrible he felt. He had behaved so childishly, just because he was confused about how to approach his feelings, and even after snubbing him, Nick was ready to die for him. Zoey was wrong. Ellis wasn't confused about that much, not anymore. Nick wouldn't abandon him or their team. Not ever.

"I'm sorry," Ellis whimpered, tightening his grip on Nick's hand.

"I know," murmured Nick, pulling Ellis in and holding him close. Ellis clung to Nick's dirty shirt.

"I'm so stupid, Nick. Lettin' really dumb things get in the way of our survival."

"Sssshh, hey, calm down," Nick comforted, rubbing Ellis' back.

Ellis closed his eyes tightly and let out a shaky breath.

"We're in the middle of the end of the world, kiddo. These things happen. You're only human, you know that, right?"

Ellis nodded into Nick's shoulder. He didn't deserve this kindness, especially from Nick, who was barely kind to anyone, ever. But he did feel calmer, although not much less guilty.

"I don't know what to do," Ellis said, finally.  He didn't think Nick would understand what he was alluding to, but it felt good to get something off his chest.

"I know you don't. And that's okay."

Ellis blinked, pulling away from Nick's embrace, shocked. Did Nick know the whole time?

"Let me sleep for a bit, okay Fireball? I'm beat," said Nick, before Ellis could bombard him with questions.

"Yeah," smiled Ellis, heart ramming against his chest. He turned to head into the kitchen.

"And Ellis?" called Nick. Ellis stopped and turned to his friend. "Don't worry. No matter what happens or what you choose to do, we can get through this. We've made it this far, and we'll make it all the way."

Ellis froze. Nick really did know what was going on, didn't he? But Nick's back was turned by the time Ellis had gathered himself.

He didn't have to make a choice. Nick would allow him to do whatever he needed and still be there for him. But Ellis knew that he would never be satisfied with himself until he sorted out his emotions completely. Even considering getting romantically involved with anyone in a zombie apocalypse was insane.  That much he knew. But they'd all gone a little insane in the past months, hadn't they? Nick was out of commission, they would be safe for a couple days, where his emotions couldn't hurt his friends. It was time to think things through. Properly this time.


	9. Chapter Nine

Over the next twenty-four hours of his life, Ellis was determined to come to a conclusion. Either he'd take a chance with Nick, or he'd wait out the trip, and maybe attempt to settle down with Zoey. The second option was the more practical one. He knew Zoey wouldn't reject his idea to begin rebuilding humanity and having somewhat normal lives again. At least, he didn't think she would. She was blunt about how much she cared for himr, and had rarely left his side since the two survival units had teamed up. But was that what he really wanted? Once upon a time, perhaps. But now?

The moment he had first met the college drop-out on the bridge, all those months back, he had seen her as an angel. She was cute, she could shoot, and she was kind. And, besides Rochelle, whom he thought of as an older sister, she was the first non-infected girl he had seen in a long time. They got along perfectly, usually in lively conversation about what life was like back home. They rarely talked about the future though, and sometimes not even the present. Maybe that didn't matter, though. Zoey could certainly be a great life companion once things began to normalize themselves again. Normalize.

A normal life wasn't something Ellis thought he could ever have with Nick, even if they were to enter a romantic relationship. For starters, falling in love with a man wasn't something Ellis had ever even thought about before he'd met Nick. He highly doubted his friends would judge him on that front, but if he was still living in Savannah, things would be entirely different. It was just so foreign to him. On top of that, Nick wasn't exactly natural spouse material.  Settling down with the conman would be bumpy, to say the least. But Nick was different. He was strong, and grumpy, and sarcastic, and knowledgeable about the world. Nick was so beautiful, and he was funny, and, at least to his survival gang, loyal, and he wasn't afraid to do whatever it took to live on. Nick was going through changes, he had already gone through so many since the infection hit. Ellis wasn't so sure that the infection had changed Zoey much at all.

"Hey!"

A female voice snapped Ellis out of his pondering. He looked over to see Zoey, shotgun slung over her shoulder, staring intently at him.

"Hey," Ellis smiled, pink beginning to dust his cheeks. One thing he definitely couldn't deny about Zoey was that she was attractive. She would have been well-sought after in his old high school.

"It's our watch," she informed him. "Louis and Francis will be heading in any second.

"Right," Ellis stood up from the chair he had been previously lazing in, and followed Zoey to the door, heart pounding. He was supposed to be figuring out the next step in what little of a personal life he had left. Sitting on watch with Zoey wasn't going to help. What he saw next wouldn't help either.

Sitting somberly in a rocking chair, not far from the door, was Nick. The conman nodded to the two in recognition.

"Can't sleep?" asked Ellis, wishing Nick would go lay down for his own good.

Nick simply shook his head in reply. Ellis wondered if Nick had the same kind of thoughts on his mind that he did. Nick seemed at least somewhat aware of their situation. However, unlike Ellis, and indeed unlike his usual self, he seemed to be alright with simply waiting things out. He was refusing to push Ellis in any direction, and that caused Ellis' chest to swell with emotion, knowing that Nick, at risk to himself and his own possible desires, was putting Ellis' needs first. He studied the tired green eyes and dark circles of Nick's face, and sighed. He knew that if Nick had feelings for him what kind of torture he must be putting him through. But that was the question, really. _Did_ Nick have feelings for him? What if he gave into his emotions only to find that he and Nick weren't on the same page? Ellis felt his stomach lurch painfully at the thought.

Finally, Francis and Louis made their way into the safe house, muttering a few words to Zoey before bidding everyone goodnight. Ellis stepped out into the cool nighttime air, Zoey right beside him. He picked up the wretched binoculars that had been the start of so many problems off of the front porch and scoped out the landscape before them. It was silent. As was expected, no infected had made their way near them since they'd cleared out the area. Ellis wasn't interested in taking chances since Nick had been attacked, so he continued to drag his sight back and forth, across the area.

"It's quiet," said Zoey softly.

"Yeah. But that don't mean we're safe."

Zoey plopped down in a dirty wooden chair that had been dragged outside.  Ellis looked over at her, the familiar twittering feeling in his stomach coming back. He'd felt it many times before, not just with Zoey, but in high school whenever he approached a cute girl. He was never that suave when it came to talking to people he was attracted to. He had been lucky enough to have met Zoey at such a pressing time, although he wasn't exactly sure if it was _luck_ , per say, considering the world was coming down around them.

"Zoey, did y' ever have any crushes? Like in high school or whatever?" he asked, nervously.

"I guess so," she said, smiling, "They weren't really that important, though. I mean, just because someone's really hot doesn't mean that they're nice. And we had a lot of jerks in my high school."

Ellis sighed. Zoey _was_ nice, though. Really nice. She'd been a great comfort to have around, small talk, aside. But sometimes things got a little dull with just the two of them. Despite how much time Ellis spent with her, she continuously reminded him of the girls he knew as a teen. They were nice and they were pretty. Full stop. Once upon a time that would have been enough, he could make a life with that. Now he wasn't so sure.

"Personality is the most important thing, right?" he asked. "I mean, when looking for a relationship."

"Yeah," she agreed. "Someone nice, and funny, and who you can talk to."

That seemed a little bland to Ellis. What about intricate flaws? Or spirit? Or bravery? Or honesty? But, then again, maybe that was the difference between someone you could have a crush on and someone you could fall in love with.

"Well, I mean, isn't there more, though?"

Zoey looked at him, questioningly.

"Like, is that enough? What about havin' chemistry, or havin' a story, or a bond? What about a person's flaws, or the way they handle dangerous situations, or-"

"Ellis," Zoey laughed, "People can't be that picky, or they'd never find anyone."

Ellis bit his lip in contemplation. Zoey was right. You didn't _need_ a story to fall in love. But what if you had one? He and Nick had one, and it would bind them for the rest of their lives. Wasn't that important?

"You remind me of a girl I used to know," said Ellis finally.

"Oh yeah?" asked Zoey teasingly, "Was she pretty?"

"Gorgeous," Ellis replied dryly.  Zoey blushed at this. "I had the worst crush on her junior year," he admitted, her face flushed even more and a smile spread itself over her features.  For once, Ellis didn't smile back.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Nothin'," he replied, shrugging. Zoey's face fell, "I was always too nervous to ask her out."

Zoey giggled a bit at this, but Ellis didn't feel like laughing. He glanced through the window to see Nick, still sitting in the rocking chair, staring at the ceiling, deep in thought. He looked so worn down, and it broke Ellis' heart. He just wanted them to argue again.  o playfully tease one another, and to fight for one another. But it had only been Nick doing the fighting for recently, and Ellis fighting against. He looked back at Zoey, and then to Nick again. His chest tightened. He didn't want to be on watch anymore, he wanted to be with Nick, coaxing him into going to bed and lying beside him, like they used to. Idealism had gotten the best of him, and he knew it. He didn't want to marry some pretty girl he had small talk with. He wanted something bigger, something fiercer, something that sent emotions through his system and strength through his being.  He wanted Nick.  He had just been too afraid to do anything about it.

"I love him."

"What?" Zoey's head turned sharply to look at Ellis, eyes full of confusion. It was close to the end of their watch, Rochelle and Coach would be there to take their spots at any moment.

"I love him," Ellis repeated, the soft light coming through the poorly boarded up window reflecting in his blue eyes. He stared, determinedly at Zoey. Hurting her wasn't his objective, but he wanted her to know, for sure, that he knew what he was talking about. He didn't need her trying to convince him otherwise.

Zoey’s eyes widened in surprise, “Who.” It wasn't a question. She knew what Ellis had meant, but wanted him to say it one more time.

“I love him, Zoey. I’m in love with Nick. And I need to do something about it, because he’s hurtin’. He’s hurtin’ so badly ‘cause of me, and I’m not gonna let him hurt anymore. I love him more than anything in the world, and he deserves t’ know it,” Ellis said, sternly, daring her to retort. He wasn't fucking around anymore. He’d messed around with Nick like a stupid teenager for long enough.

“E-Ellis, Nick-”

“I know,” he cut her off. It felt as if his chest were caving in. He’d pushed his limit, breaking Nick’s in the process. He glanced back through the window at the conman, who was still sitting in the entryway, staring up blankly at the ceiling. He had done that. He had turned the unequivocal, strong, and angry man he had fallen so very in love with into a bleak, fightless mass of misery. He was sorry. He had been immature and selfish, never understanding what Nick really needed from him. Now he knew. He just hoped it wasn't too late. “I know more about him than you ever will, Zoey. And that’s been the problem from the start. I gave him up to impress you. And in the end it only hurt me and everyone left that I care about.”

Zoey looked at the ground, irritably, “He doesn't love you back, Ellis. He’s probably not capable of it.”

“You’re wrong,” Ellis snapped, “You've been wrong from the start, and I don’t even know who to blame. Probably myself, because I tried to deny Nick what he really needed, and myself what I've wanted all along.” It was his turn to feel broken. For so long he had tried to convince himself that he had wanted Zoey. She was a cute girl who was nice to him. What more did anyone need, right? But he had been childish. She wasn’t enough, and she never would be. Not after he had been exposed to the raw ache Nick had made him feel ever since the day they had met on the rooftop of that hotel in Georgia. Crushes and stomach butterflies could never compare to it. Nick’s dry wit, his ferocity, his talent, and his awkward generosity burned throughout Ellis. He could feel a pained scream, clinging to the back of his throat, and if noise wasn’t the infected’s main trigger, he would have let it out right then. He wasn't angry with Zoey, he was angry with himself for not accepting everything sooner.

Zoey blinked, not necessarily looking hurt, but certainly looking upset. She let him continue, though.

“Before you joined the group, a few months back, we had an incident with a helicopter pilot. He was the second one to die on us, too,” he said, softly, looking down at his feet. “I was so sure we’d get outta here at last. I was so tired of runnin’, Zoey. I still am.”

Zoey looked on in confusion, and although her eyes softened, he wasn't sure just how much she understood.

“Nick saved me in a way I don’t think anyone else could that night, because I broke, Zoey. I was so fuckin’ broken,” he sighed. “He held me, and talked to me in a way that I’d never heard before. He gave me hope and made me want to give hope more strongly than I ever...” he could feel tears stinging at his eyes, as the memories of defeat and fear threatened to surround him. He looked back at Nick, finding his anchor in the older man, before becoming steady enough to continue. “The reason I know you’re wrong ‘bout him is because he did tell me he loved me that night. I just didn’t realize it. I didn’t know how. I know now.”

Just then, the door creaked open, and Rochelle stepped outside, followed by Coach.

“How is it out here?” asked Rochelle, but Ellis jumped up quickly and pushed past her, into the entry way where Nick still was. He didn't bother to glance back at Zoey, no longer caring if he had convinced her or not. This wasn’t about her anymore. He would apologize for his insecurities and the way their friendship had played out at a later date. Right then, there was only one thing he wanted and only one person he needed.

Slowly, Nick moved his head to see Ellis approaching him at a fast pace. He sighed inwardly, hoping that nothing was said during  watch that would cause any more tension between them. It had torn the two men up enough already. Suddenly, Nick felt a body collide with his, and Ellis was crouched in the older man’s lap. Before he could respond, Ellis had grabbed hold of his shirt collar, and yanked the conman forward, slamming their lips together, savagely. Nick whimpered in shock, head spinning, too astonished to move.

Roughly, Ellis pulled his face a couple of inches from Nick's, piercing blue eyes staring directly into his green ones, tears beginning to trickle down his cheeks. Nick instinctively moved to wipe them away, still gawking at the man he adored.

“You,” Ellis hissed stormily, voice barely above a whisper, “It’s always been you.”

With Ellis’ words, Nick could feel his own hot, wet tears of relief, running carelessly down the sides of his face. And with them seemed to go all of the pent up hurt, frustration, and confusion the past weeks had hammered into him. Him? Ellis was choosing him? The heartless monster that never did anything for the good of anyone but himself. He, the liar, the gambler, and the asshole who nobody wanted around. The kindest, and most beautiful person he had ever known, Ellis, wanted him.

It was Nick’s turn to initiate kissing Ellis, and he did so, letting out a sound of genuine joy as he pulled him closer, repeatedly pressing to the younger man’s lips with his own, only truly breaking apart when neither could breathe any longer.

“I love you, Nick. Only you. And I’m so, so sorry it took me this long to do somethin’ about it,” Ellis said, pressing his forehead to Nick’s jaw, “I didn’t understand before, what makes love, actual love. But I do now.”

“That’s all that matters, kid,” replied Nick, running his fingers through Ellis’ soft hair, placing his beloved cap in his lap, “You’re my saving grace, you know that? I love you, Ellis.”

“Saving grace, huh?” chuckled Ellis, breathing in Nick scent, running the bridge of his nose across his jawline.

“You make me want to be something more, Ellis. You take all of these parts of me, and make me want to fight to do something worthwhile with them. I want to live because you believe in me. You, your determination, your kindness, your outlook, your spirit, they make me feel alive,” Nick whispered, “I've always wanted to tell you that.”

“I feel the same,” Ellis murmured into Nick’s neck, “I just haven’t been able to realize it until recently.”

“El, I’m a scamming, no-good, pessimist,” laughed Nick, squeezing his love’s shoulder.

“No,” said Ellis, “You’re blunt, but honest about how you feel, and you’re strong, Nick, real strong, and smart, and…incredible. You’re like an untamable storm, Nick. That’s how I’ve always seen you.”

Nick felt his chest tighten with adoration. Ellis really did think that highly of him, didn’t he? His breath hitched, as the southerner gazed up at him, sincerity and absolute exaltation in his eyes.

“I’ve always seen you as that way too,” said Nick, leaning down and placing another kiss on Ellis’ lips, “An untamable storm, ready to take on anything.”

“We’ll take it on together,” promised Ellis.

The two survivors held one another like that until morning, where they would, as always, be fighting life and limb just for the right to see another day. Somehow, though, things seemed far more hopeful.

They had found enough hope and enough love in each other to believe in life after Hell. That was what made them strong. Ellis and Nick loved each other for who they were, truly and completely. And in with that, they felt as if they could take on anything.


End file.
